ExternalProject: expose _ep_cache_args_script to the caller
This is needed so that the caller can add a dependency on the cache file.
Fixes: #20668 (closed)
This can be rebased back more if needed. It was broken all the way back in 3.8.0.
Do we have infrastructure to test things like this? I don't see anything existing in ExternalProjects tests.
Cc: @timpatt
Backport: release