VS: De-duplicate custom command dependencies

Avoid listing the same input more than once in custom commands generated
in `.vcxproj` and `.csproj` files.  In the case of a `.vcxproj` file
additionally avoid listing the source to which the command is attached
since it is already implicitly a dependency.

This is a nice cleanup and also works around a VS 2019 16.1 regression
in MSBuild dependency checking.  Starting with that version, MSBuild now
re-builds custom commands when the list of dependencies has changed.
However, its check is confused by duplicate dependencies.
De-duplicating them avoids this problem.

Co-Author: Brad King <brad.king@kitware.com>
Fixes: #19303
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