Restore "all" target in subdirectories marked EXCLUDE_FROM_ALL

The "all" target in each directory is supposed to have targets from that directory even if the directory itself is marked EXCLUDE_FROM_ALL in its parent. This was broken by !2816 (merged) which made the participation of a target in "all" independent of context. Revert much of the logic change from that commit to restore the old behavior. Then re-implement the behavior intended by the commit to keep its test working. Extend the test to cover the old behavior too.

Also revert the main Makefile global graph logic change from !3338 (merged) for the "all" and "preinstall" targets. The MR cleaned up the Makefile generator to use the same logic for the "all" target in the top-level directory as for subdirectories. It exposed a long-existing bug that caused the "all" target in a subdirectory to include the "all" targets from sub-subdirectories even if they are marked EXCLUDE_FROM_ALL. The Tests/SubDir test should have failed but the problem was currently covered up by the main bug fixed here.

Revert the top-level "all" and "preinstall" targets to the old approach so we can fix the main bug without exposing the long-existing bug at the top-level. Leave the "clean" target in the new approach because it does not honor EXCLUDE_FROM_ALL anyway.

Fixes: #19753 (closed)